The Story of the "Sinking Gull," Who Was Flying Underwater, That is, Me
Can you relate to it?
Hunting for “the Truth”? Maybe, some people are, but at what cost?
This post was inspired by Michael after my previous article. The article itself received a cautious number of “Like”s, perhaps because it was long, perhaps because it was unusually complex with several layers to understand, and perhaps because in 20 countries (Canada being the last one), one can go to prison, perhaps even for “liking” it… Michael’s comment is a bit long, but it makes sense to the point that I even pinned it. However, it brings up essential questions about what and who a person is and to what end, so this post is about spiritual experiences, not about psyops and Judaism.
Here is what Michael said:
I regret not learning chess in my youth. It was bad enough being classified by my peers as a nerd and serious student, placed in the so-called accelerated classes. But I did learn chess several years ago when I became enamored with watching the chess tournaments live from the St Louis Chess Club.
In the 70’s I was aware of Bobby Fisher as a chess prodigy, but did not follow him. I did know that he had become affiliated with the Worldwide Church of God in Pasadena CA. In high school I had begun receiving their literature debunking the “theory of evolution”, and became familiar with their Biblical teachings. I'm sure that is why Bobby followed them.
They were led at the time by Herbert W Armstrong, who started Ambassador College in Pasadena, with another campus in Texas. I had considered enrolling after high school, and visited both campuses.
They taught the keeping of the original Ten Commandments and the Feasts and Holy Days commanded in the Covenant to be kept forever, along with the clean food laws. But they did not consider themselves “Jewish”, but Christian. They acknowledged that the true Messiah was a Hebrew, an Israelite, and a Jew, his lineage being through the Tribe of Judah.
They also realized and taught the history of the Twelve Tribes of Israel, and the history of the two ancient Kingdoms of Judah and Israel, two separate nations, that went their own ways, and suffered different punishments from YHWH for their disobedience.
Today there are far more living descendants of the Ten Tribes of Israel than there are of the two Tribes that comprised the Jews - Judah and Levi. There are actual Jews living today, and there are the false Jews, those Khazarians who stole the Jewish identity, and are the ones who are part of the cabal. And by “Israelite” I do not refer to the proxy state of Israel in the middle east.
A simple way to understand this is to say “All Jews are Israelites, but not all Israelites are Jews”. (not including the false Jews). The vast majority of Israelites today are not Jews. Hundreds of millions of Israelites occupy many western nations today, including America.
I was fortunate to learn in high school that much of what we are taught as facts are actually lies, like the satanic theory of evolution. Even so, in 1969 I watched the “live” moon landing on TV and never for once doubted it was real. Only decades later, long after learning we had been lied to about who murdered JFK among other things, I was forced to confront the NASA lies and discovered we never went to the moon, it was all faked, and several of the “astronauts” who refused to go along with the sham were murdered, including Grissom and the other two burned alive in the capsule.
But I still believed in the spinning globe earth. It was only in the last 2-3 years that I slowly allowed myself to seriously consider this question. I now have firmly come to the belief that NASA and its CIA/cabal promoters also have lied to us about “space”, and that the Earth is not a spinning globe, but a stationary level plane. This is the real big lie that must be exposed. There is no curvature observable, never has been, and there are many proofs of this.
Incidentally, my ancestry is English/Irish/Scottish and some Dutch German, all clearly Israelite descendants
In my reply, I said,
This strikes me as an extremely sensible and helpful summary of your thoughts. I am pinning it.
Thank you for your detailed introduction of Bobby's choice of religion. I’m a bit puzzled about the 280-something “food laws” in Judaism, because the ones for seafood made sense before refrigeration was introduced, and I never understood the restrictions on pork. The only Christian denomination I know is Calvinism, where you know that G*d loves you because you are affluent with lots of progenies, and Yahve punishes you, if you are not living up to the standards.
To me, it’s even more confusing if I am a Jew or not. It turned out only 13 years ago that my paternal ancestry is, nearly with absolute certainty, Jewish, but they catholicized around 1918, and the Catholic Church made their “history” disappear to the point that they were not even dragged to the labor camps. By Jews, only the mother is certain, so apart from growing up at the edge of a Jewish quarter, having next to no religious experience at a young age, but not even noticing which of my friends were Jewish, I am a weird lot. :)
And yes, the Moon landing was a farce. It's interesting why the Soviets bought into it:
The Moon landing, by the way resembles the H* fable, too...
The curvature of the Earth is easy to ascertain, even for simple people like you and I. Just look at the streetlights across a lake like 8-10 miles away, and only the ones that are tall enough (about 15” or taller) can be seen. I'm not saying this whole world cannot be an illusion, but if it is, we are royally screwed... Of course, not all the stories are even feasible, with the UFOs taking the lead among them...
Yes, The Origin of Species (1859) was a first attempt by pretty much the same people who are now holding the whole world captive, to convince people that they are only animals (sadly, quite a few of them are, to the extent of never being able to exercise Free Will: https://rayhorvaththesource.substack.com/p/i-have-solved-the-question-of-free), so human dignity must go down the drain, which is a good precursor for today’s technocracy...
Fisher, somewhat surprisingly, wanted to be, and was buried, as a Roman Catholic (with the new fake Pope, that sort of things has become precarious).
It was my father who, a few years before he died, showed me the Fisher-Spassky games, but I was not much good at chess at the time; preferred physical sports.
Bobby was self-taught from the age of seven, kind of like me, except I only went into chess in college, where we had a “Chess Department” in the smoking place and were playing for a quarter a pop (plus challenge). There were master candidates and a good chess hustler there, so it took me “only” a few years to “graduate” with my “blitz certificate.” My favorite plays were 30/30, though.
Thank you, Michael... As you know, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so my article would not be worth pittance without your and my other readers’ thoughts. For that matter, my impression is that you and I are about the same age. Well, you might be a bit older, but I am over the age, when the $175 a month is mandatory for Medicare/Medicare Advantage.
As you are (and Napoleon, too :) ) saying, luck has nothing to do with what happens to us in life. I, for one, have been saved numerous times by others who simply cared. It has taken the time to grow relatively old to realize that, too. On the other hand, my direction is only my own; I cannot even share it, because it’s personal for everyone, especially if they care to use their Free Will, which is a lot more difficult and rare than what most people would surmise:
https://rayhorvaththesource.substack.com/p/i-have-solved-the-question-of-free
After Bill Gates took over Kahn Academy, it started to “teach” ideological subjects, too, as if “sciences” were not confusing enough and suitable for brainwashing; history is one of those...
When I was younger, I had several events of epiphany, usually around 4 AM in a dream half awake (but not limited to that). When a problem is brewing in my mind, after a few weeks, my mind automatically assembles the solution. Curiously enough, you are talking about continuity, while I have experienced a spiritual space (no funny business or even “meditation” involved; I don’t believe in hocus-pocuses, only in what I might call awareness, for the lack of a better word) where everything and everybody is present, and time doesn’t exist. I think, you and I might be talking about the same experience, and that would make an interesting article that you and I could share. Sometimes I saw texts in my dream or heard a dictation, and even the internal voice that exists in all spiritual traditions. Everything always panned out. No, I am not a religious nut, but I have seen what I have seen (no imaginary voices/images ever, either):
In fact, I am curious to learn how universal this experience is, which is where my readers might be able to help me out and, perhaps, help out each other. When I was 13, I had six months of my life in a fantastic sensation, a craving that I didn’t want to ever end. Decades later, as a professor, I used to ask my students how many of them had the same experience, and it was about one in 300. I also had my puppy love at the same time at 13, but this feeling was from another Universe, a LOT more powerful...
School, including my “doctoral” programs, bored the heck out of me, because I usually look at the problem, and have several solutions, while such program only promote an ideology, usually combined with the "professors'"personal interests. I remember in the 6th grade, my pal, sitting next to me, started laughing during class. I asked him, “What are you doing, are you crazy?” He said, “You are whistling.” At that moment, I realized I had been quietly whistling in order to soothe my ennui. :) I was reading ahead by several years, but I was enrolled to “school”... Most classes were redundant and even the occasionally helpful ones took 50 minutes to explain something that can be explained in 30-90 seconds, and most teachers were either morons or even legit torturers...
Not sure what you mean by taking a break from personal responsibility, but at 19, I had to take care of my family, and it all came natural; I was not, and am still not proud of fulfilling my duty; it was my job. A few years later, I had a two-month break from “personal responsibility,” but soon recovered from the delusion, and it looks like I managed to get through that period without hurting people (a whole lot)...
After my specific experience with the Divine at the age of five that cannot be explained by the current laws of Physics, and had an exchange with a the Divine, a Guardian Angel, or whatever you name it, at 15, I had another conversation with what Tao calls the “Inner Voice,” but it exists in most forms of spiritual experience. According to the Tao (I am not a follower, only a parallel observer of the human experience), “There is nothing respectable about a man who hasn’t heard the Tao by the time he is 40 or 50.” I was told I would never want as long as I keep searching for the Truth. Not sure how and why, but I am still relatively alright, but I’m certain about the dozens of people without whose help I wouldn’t be here or my life would have ended in a dead end.
Of course, as everyone else, I need a foundation, something I can rely on as a frame of reference, which I found in divine revelation, which is an awkward term, because what I am doing here is searching for common denominators for the human experience. That can mean a number of things based on your conviction or affiliation, but it’s usually the personal experience what matters. I’m certain that atheists have also encountered someting like that, but I’m not sure h ow it can be explained based on their premises, not that it matters as long as the experience can be shared, at least to some extent. As you know, as a Cognitive Scientist, I am fully aware that human cognition is incapable to even comprehend “the Truth,” so I am not pretending to be an oracle for it. However, being committed and dedicated means that one has to give up most, if not all, the things to which they are attached and, perhaps, leave the rest of it up to a “Higher Power.” That, of course, doesn’t mean I wouldn’t protect those whom I love and the ones I’m responsible for.
At 16, I also had what “native Americans” tend to call a “life dream.” I even wrote a poem about it that I can still remember (I usually don’t remember my poems, and I haven’t written a single one in decades). I saw myself at the age around 40 on a seashore (which I recognized 22 years later, when I was actually there), and I saw a seagull circling, and I knew it was me. It kept descending until it went below the water, and it was still flying, and in the end, it turned into light, which I knew was and “angel.” I guess, if I had a Native American name, I would be “Sinking Gull.”
Still above the water:
A kind reader, in the comment section to this post, called my attention to the story of Jonathan Livingston Seagull, whose story I read three years later, but it certainly applies. Here is the text:
https://www.crisrieder.org/thejourney/wp-content/uploads/2021/02/Jonathan-Livingston-Seagull.pdf
I’ll have to catch with his posts, because it sometimes takes me months to catch up with my favorites:
And here is the book read out with some omissions:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AuEflV5Tto8
I’ll also keep providing a response to the reader’s reply.
As far as responding to your question of belief systems, faith makes miracles possible for negative thinkers who do not ordinarily win or survive cancer, illness, and other trauma as well as fast as positive thinkers who do not consider themselves victims. I did when I was young—committed suicide to escape, repeatedly, only to be taught, informed, and convinced to return for a lifelong adventure that seemed utterly impossible. Fifty-five years later, I am a writer, getting ready to publish books finally, travel to sell ideas there in around the world once the wars are over to complete a dream, a series of NDEs that spanned a year of deep depression as a crippled bullied child who sought death to find the reason why I was alive and forced to suffer so much. No one can imagine where these bodies will lead us, but I do believe in fate, faith, and miracles at this end of the road, younger than you still as I hit 69, running hard, steady, and fast. Substack does not even get 30 views or assist on my site for videos. Wii, those who see and write the truths do get shadowbanned here, too.
I didn't see your post until I got the message referring to it. Had I seen it sooner I would definitely have commented as your post resonated with me in many ways, Jonathan Livingston Horvath:-)
Spiritual experiences, ah... I had an invisible friend when I was very small with a name similar to mine. We used to visit an imaginary shop owned by Mr Deepson where we bought samsa and dapsa. I didn't know at the time that I had had a twin sister who died in utero.
Shortly afterwards, when my grandfather died, I terrified my poor mother by asking her who the man in the overcoat and trilby was, playing cards at the bottom of my bed. Said gentleman appeared again (with knocking!) before anyone knew my father was terminally ill, and reappeared in spirit drawings I did much later, always prior to the appearance of the actual subject of the drawing - a guide if you will.
The night before T, the fiance of my daughter G, was involved in a fatal car accident, I felt a terrible sense of dread. I was feeding my big twin (she was twenty minutes older than my little twin and at some 30 months somewhat big to be being breastfed but that's how it was) and I was afraid something was going to happen to her - I still have this fear a bit, and she is 28 now, but it seems that that fear was not for her, because he following morning we had a call from T's mother at the hospital, saying there had been a crash and he was unlikely to survive. We dashed to the hospital in what we thought was a taxi but was just a car belonging to a man visiting neighbours.
After a horrendous night they switched off life support, with my daughter present, and she just 'switched off' too. Back home, I put the money I had taken for the taxi under the vase on the hall table and went into the kitchen where my husband was with the twins to get tea and some aspirin for my head. I took a phone call and went back for the aspirin only to find them gone. Later the ten pound note I had left under the vase appeared in the middle of the living room floor. This was the beginning of a lot of telekinetic fun that continued for months and involved many family members.
A couple of days later i was waiting for the twins to wake up from their nap so that I could take them to meet my husband in town to do some shopping, when I smelt ozone and immediately checked all electrical sockets in case the house was burning down. It was strongest by G's room, where the door was ajar though I know she had closed it earlier to stop the cat sleeping on her bed and scratching up the headboard. Inside, the air was crackling, and I heard a voice saying, "You've got to tell her. I'm still here! I'm scared for her." Without thinking, I answered, "You should be telling her not me, I don't understand. Why is this happening? Why did you have to die? WHY?" And there was a bang and the connection was lost. Later when G got home she asked me who had rolled up the left leg of her new trouser suit.^
This was the beginning of a huge spiritual journey that involved passing on messages and pictures to friends, family and strangers, as well l as receiving knowledge about esoteric symbolism (via my masonic grandfather who died before I was born), the way souls enter the next stage after death, through a sort of waterfall of light, and the nature of the universe in its crystalline state as well as the inter-connected multi-dimensional nature of our solar system. Oh, and a Walter Russell-type 'vortex machine' for healing. There was also a convoluted sort of near-death experience where I travelled with S, my daughter-in-law's mum, as she passed, rising up towards a wall with a yellow arched gate with roses growing round it, looking down at family who were sad for me, and knowing that I could love them even better from there. A phone call interrupted this - it was from E, my daughter-in-law, explaining that S had just passed and they had read a letter I had written to her just beforehand.
Vast energetic beings intervened to help my husband through a traumatic time, and, best of all, my almost-son-in-law was reborn into our family - this confirmed by two psychic mediums with no knowledge of what had happened previously. They also confirmed that he had been my own miscarried baby previously, which explained the closeness between us.
I feel so blessed and will be eternally grateful for what has happened and what continues to happen with the aid of spirit but as thy do tell me, "You always have to pay." and all this has come at a great cost, with family rifts that are hard to heal.
Because of the effects on my life I have kept quiet about these things for many years, and i withdrew a book I had written on the subject. Reading your post, though, Ray, I could not help but say what has happened, because it is important now more than ever to remember and to share the FACT that we are more than matter (whatever 'matter' may be...) BECAUSE THEY WANT TO TAKE IT AWAY FROM US.
*Not until some twenty years later did I discover the meaning of the masonic trouser trick - the evening before the crash T and G had been at a friend's place playing silly games and being 'homies', a symbol of which was apparently rolling up their left trouser leg. T had obviously seen this as a way of getting through to G from the 'other side.'